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© Companions of the Longbow
Robin Hood Goofs - Episode 4
Episode 5 "Turk Flu"
The Sheriff is importing slaves to work a dangerous mine. In the meantime there is an archery competition at Nottingham Fair.
Djaq’s “Disguise”
This episode introduces the Saracen character of Djaq (pronounced Jack) who is a woman pretending to be a boy. She’s part of a consignment of Saracen slaves sent to work the iron mine. Her disguise involves calling herself Djaq and having short hair. Here’s a picture. Can you guess which one is her?
The Non-Speaking Extra
During this episode the character of Rowan sees his father killed by Sir Guy’s soldiers and naturally is quite upset. He gets a scene to explain how upset he is and what he’s going to do about it. It’s very emotional. Except the whole scene is played out between him and his mother and the mother is a non-speaking part. She doesn’t say a word. She has to nod and look
concerned and touch his arm in a tender way but she’s like a non-speaking extra in a soap opera. You know, the ones you see buying a pint of beer, a newspaper or a cup of coffee in the background. They’re the ones who have to emote their thanks when they get their change, but mustn’t say anything. They could’ve had a whip round and paid for a speaking part!
Collapsing Mines
Robin, in an effort of close down the Sheriff’s dangerous iron mines, decides they must pack wood into the excavation and set fire to it so that the props holding up the roof of each shaft burns and collapses. That’s a good plan. Only, when Little John falls through the boards of a closed off mine straight down to the bottom, Robin calls for a ladder to go down and get him. Except he’s told they broke up all the ladders to use as fire wood and they must now figure out a new way of getting down to rescue Little John. A bit of head scratching and they find some rope... The thing is, if they broke up the ladders to pack into the mine, how did they get out of each mine shaft the first time?
How to Make Smelling Salts, Robin Hood Style
Djaq, as the newly appointed science person for the show, decides she is going to make some “smelling salts” to wake Little John up who’s unconscious at the bottom of the mine shaft. She does this by mixing some hydrochloric acid, which she keeps in a handy bottle around her neck, (as you do) with some “silver looking iron” she gets from the spoil pile of the iron mine. (I presume it’s hydrochloric acid because it’s the strongest acid around at the time, having reportedly been discovered by the alchemist Jabir ibn Hayyan around the year 800). Here’s the science bit. If she’s mixing the iron and the hydrochloric acid she’s producing iron chloride, generically called ferric chloride. This stuff is deliquescent, meaning it fumes in moist air due to the evolution of hydrogen chloride. The hydrogen chloride itself is a colourless gas with an irritating pungent odour and is highly irritating to the eyes and the mucous membranes. I’ve looked it up. It will cause coughing, throat irritation, severe breathing difficulties and skin inflammation or burns. But it’s great at waking up big blokes who’ve fallen down a mineshaft, eh? Never mind the fractured skull, concussion, broken bones ... Pat yourself on the back for reading all of that by the way.
Dullest Archery Competition Ever!
Over the course of the show there’s an archery competition going on in Nottingham. It’s the famous one that’s in all the Robin Hood legends. Well done to the makers for remembering a bit of Robin Hood lore and including it. Anyway, Robin, pretending to be Rowan, gets up at the end and shoots one arrow to win the prize for him. Hurrah! Except as he only had to shoot one arrow and there were about a dozen other arrows sticking out of the boss and the competition lasted all afternoon, was it the case that there six hundred competitors of which five hundred and eighty seven missed the target or that there was only a dozen competitors and there was a half hour break between each single shot? Either way it must have made dullest ever Robin Hood Golden Arrow competition in the history of Robin Hood.
Worst Boss Design Award Goes To …
When I say worst boss I’m talking about the archery target and not the sheriff of Nottingham … It’s made from coloured rope positioned in concentric rings. The reason why it’s a bad design is that there’s a clear gap between the rings. This means that you could manage to shoot closer to the bulls-eye than your opponent but your arrow could go through the gap and not score. Brilliant.
Medieval Laser Beams
To further bolster Djaq’s science credentials she carries a magnifying glass. She uses it during the show to do such things as burn her way through ropes and start fires. However this magnifying glass seems to be able to work without the aid of sunlight. At the end of the show she manages to light a camp fire, from some distance away, simply by pointing it horizontally at a bundle of sticks. Milliseconds after holding it up, and while still in the shade no less, what can only be described as laser beam is emitted from the magnifying glass. She then promptly forgets about owning this amazing magnifying glass for the rest of the series.